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First Prom Held in Stamford for Gay-Straight Alliance Students

While prom season was in full swing, one dance stood out from the pack.

Who wants to be prom king when you can be crowned the "most outgoing person?"

One student was on Friday night when Stamford students broke tradition and held the city’s first Rainbow Ball, a prom for members of the Gay-Straight Alliance (GSA) at , , and neighboring cities. The first-of-its-kind dance was held at the and had over 100 attendees.

“The prom was amazing," 16-year-old Stamford High student Julian Arias told Patch. "Everyone felt like they belonged and that’s where they needed to be. They weren’t struggling with their sexuality or discrimination, they were just kids having fun and not trying to fit in.”

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Arias joined the alliance last year as a freshman but felt that the group, which was traditionally a social setting, had to be more active. His friends at Westihill evidently felt the same. In January, the Westhill GSA began brewing ideas about holding a prom for Stamford GSA members and neighboring students. While most proms are booked a year in advance with a few years’ worth of fundraised money, the GSA members had under five months to organize theirs.

“We didn’t want them to feel short changed," Kate Tobin, English teacher at Westhill and GSA c0-advisor, said. "We decided from the beginning that this prom had to be as good as any other prom, if not better."

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Soon after, donations began flowing in from members of the community and beyond supporting the group’s endeavors. The prom was primarily sponsored by the Norwalk Triangle Community Center and the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN), both nonprofit organizations supporting the gay community.

“We’re very grateful for the outpouring of support and those wishing us well,” Tobin said.

The dance even earned the Stamford students an acknowledgment at GLSEN’s national fundraiser held in New York City on May 23. The students were nominated by Fairfield County’s regional GLSEN organization and invited to the black tie gala. There, amongst legislators, celebrities and philanthropists, the students were asked to stand and received nearly two minutes of applause from supporters. Tobin said meeting Eliza Byard, executive director of GLSEN, was a highlight for both her and the students.

Their hard work came to fruition Friday night at the inaugural GSA prom. Arias, decked out in a white and purple mask, said that his costume was slightly more “outrageous” than others.

“I wasn’t seeking attention, I was trying to prove that no matter what you wear you’re still a human being and clothing is irrelevant to who you are as a person,” she said. Moreover, he said, everyone had fun.

Arias has heard some students are unhappy with the fact that GSA members are receiving a separate prom. “We wouldn’t be having it if we didn’t feel harassed and uncomfortable at a straight prom,” he said. Arias says he does plan to attend his junior prom next year.  

In addition to this year’s Rainbow Ball, the GSA students in Stamford also held a day of silence in April. “The point is to be silent to express the silence faced by some students when it’s difficult to speak about who and what you are," Tobin said. "Kids get really passionate about it."

If you'd like to make a donate to the GSA's 2012 prom, contact Tobin at KTobin@ci.stamford.ct.us

Below is a poem written by Julian Arias as a reflection of this weekend’s dance:

Equality — the unexpected.

I'm doing it cause I care, doing it, cause I'm aware, of the judgement, hate and lies that they have all brought to us.

All the pain and the criticism, that have made them weaker people, but I will stand by their side, because together, we are equal.

Bullying leaves scars, not visible to the human eye, but inside we're burning, because the scars were left open, we hide our insecurities because we're afraid of what others might have to say.

But what I'm here to tell you today is that they have all made me brave, their comments hurt my soul, but as i healed i reached the sun... Be strong and persevere, because one day you will succeed, you'll find out who you are, and you'll finally be free.

Help people without thinking, because a life could be sinking, but once they find the answers, their lives won't be in danger..

I'm here when you need me, because i was alone too, society made me feel like i didn't belong.. if i told the truth.

- Julian Arias

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